Sometimes I wish I didn’t care so much about honesty, or what people say about/to me, or how people judge/view me, or their opinion, or their expectations. But like the little tool that I am, I care. A lot. But I always let myself down when I do try to change or meet their expectations, etc. But why do I care so much? What’s the point? What will I gain if I do? Abso-fucking-lutely nothing. Just higher expectations, etc. to deal with- that I wouldn’t be able to ever. And again, disappoint not only them but myself. So why should I care? Why can’t I just be happy with myself and just say “hey, that’s nice and all but who died and made you King?” two words: self-esteem. Hi. I have none. I’m sure you’ve felt this way as well, reader.
What is it that just makes people feel so put off about me? Or people who feel like this in general? Obviously something does. Why can we never gain your approval? What makes you so fucking great and wonderful that puts us below you? Nothing. Not a damn thing. So why do we continue to vye for your approval? Because we’re good people and we want to make people feel happy. I’m sorry. Why is that wrong? I dunno. I should really just be happy with myself and who I am. There’s really nothing wrong with me. Yet I feel all the time there is. All the goddamn time.
THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH ME.
THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU.
IT’S THEM. ALWAYS THEM.
Too bad they can’t accept the people we became. Oh well. That’s all I’ve gotta say.